My father had taught me to be nice first, because you can always be mean later, but once you’ve been mean to someone, they won’t believe the nice anymore. So be nice, be nice, until it’s time to stop being nice, then destroy them.
It’s 2089. all cops have been replaced by genetically modified dogs that let children pet them, help old ladies cross the street, chase down criminals, never eat donuts, bark at cat-callers, analyze dna, easily track down murders, pee on white collar criminals, and tear the faces off of rapists. utopia has been reached.
How was this accomplished you ask?
Well its simple
Dogs are colorblind
british people are so fucking cute
they called christmas lights ‘fairy lights’
they called sweaters ‘jumpers’
sneakers are ‘trainers’
they say ‘you alright/you ok’ instead of ‘how are you’
fuck off you condescending twat
Most British sentence I’ve ever heard